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whenever I weak

2023.05.10 15:05

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Whenever I am weak

 

I was probably about six years old

I almost died of tuberculosis

With the care of a nurse who is not the nurse

Came back to life

body is weak and mind is also

A year later, I was able to skip school, but

confidence fell as it fell

family took care of me even more

Anxiety has always been in my heart

Father went to teach four kilometers

away from home

He used to take me to the elementary school

where he worked

It is the largest school in the area

seeing healthy children

looking at the new phone without number plate

for me to see

to have the power to challenge the new world

that day,

father put me on the back of bicycle

and headed to school

passing through the winding rice fields

running a new road

passing through a slightly larger town with a mill

we went uphill for a long time

we met the downhill road again

but the brakes didn't work properly

Stopped but

pebble singing

we couldn't cross a small stream

we fell into the water together

because of me

The biggest and strongest father in town

The smallest and weakest me

woke up and held hands

a nearby acquaintance's house

to dry clothes

When the clothes were dry, father put me on the back again

he started pedaling toward school

Before long,

the fearsome special forces soldiers

walking in the morning with one powerful voice

passed by the ranks

faces of the soldiers are still not forgotten

how much fear, tension, sweat and drenched

The expression that sang the military song

Daddy and I finally arrived at school

In the dorm room, I started my day

From the moment

I left home,

I laid my cheek against my father's back

I was holding father's waist with both hands

patiently

I couldn't look ahead,

I couldn't look left and right,

I only saw the ground and

I had no anxiety or fear

I didn't ask when he was alive, but...

that experience has passed nearly 60 years

I drove by there a few years ago

In my ears, the sound of a bicycle

ting-a-ling-a-ling

Father,

I can remember feeling of the wide and warmth of

your back

until now and in the future.

 

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